More Finy on the Web
  • Finy's Flickr Page
  • Finy's Myspace Page
  • Finy's Facebook Page
  • Organizations I Care About
  • Alzheimer's Association NYC Junior Committee
  • National Down Syndrome Society
  • The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society
  • Red Sox Links
  • Official Page
  • Boston Globe
  • Royal Rooters
  • Red Sox Blogs
  • 12eight
  • A Red Sox Fan in Pinstripe Territory
  • Empyreal Environs
  • Joy of Sox
  • Professor Thom's Blog
  • The Soxaholix
  • Blogs I Read
    Saturday, July 29, 2006
    On Why It's Good to Have Girlfriends
    Up until I graduated from college the majority of my friends were male. While in school it was Finy and the guys, a group of four guy friends I met orientation week and promptly hung out with every day for four years. It was easier, we had a ton in common, there were no weird backstabbing issues, we didn't fight over who-liked-whom, and I could always count on them for a beer and a night of cards or sports. Sure there were a few weird are-we-really-just-friends When Harry Met Sally type moments, but overall, these guys were like family to me.

    But as I get older, I've begun to realize more and more how important it is to have really close girlfriends. And yesterday was a prime example. I was facing many women's biggest fear: the dressing room mirror. Faced with the reality that I had worn most of my bras threadbare, and that in two weeks time I would be in MN, on a beach, not owning a bathing suit, I was about to endeavor on a shopping trip fit for a House of Horrors. Bathing suit and bra shopping share something in common - they require a LOT of near nakedness in front of an always-unflattering mirror while being lit by some asshole dressing room designer intent on squashing any self-confidence you may have had before entering. I needed reinforcements.

    Luckily DTR was faced with the same issues I was, and agreed to take the trip with me. As we wandered around Lord & Taylor and Macy's, lamenting the fact that the cutest bras are only available in teeny girl sizes and laughing at the issues a water bra could present (think Will and Grace) I found myself laughing more than I ever would have on my own. DTR is quite possibly one of the funniest people I know, and having her there, taking my mind off the fact that the bathing suits I was picking up are a good two sizes larger than where I would ideally like to be (and where I was last summer) was ridiculously helpful. I mean, none of my guy friends would have been able to help when I walked out of the dressing room wearing a "size reducing bathing suit" looked like a stuffed pig. They wouldn't have been able to laugh with me as I struggled to get the damn thing on, or realized the hilarity in the fact that yes, my torso looked great but only because the suit had pushed all my fat to above and below said suit. And if I had been there alone I just would have cried instead of laughed so hard I almost let out a little pee.

    And what guy would have been able to try on wonderbras with me even though both of us are way too well endowed to be able to wear them? Or exclaimed over the dressing room wall "I look like the bow of a ship in this thing!"

    Exactly none. Not even the gayest gay man could have done what we did yesterday. Sometimes, only girlfriends can get the job done.


    posted by FINY @ Saturday, July 29, 2006   5 comments
    Friday, July 28, 2006
    Because I Refuse To Act My Age
    Just because I turned 26 yesterday was clearly no reason to act like it. The Twin's surpise outing? A trip to Coney Island!! After lamenting earlier in the week that batting cages in the NYC area are a scarce, The Twin took it upon himself to bring me to the closest one. Well, I don't know if it's the closest, but it's DEFINITELY the most fun.

    That's right, last night we took a trip out to Coney Island. And though neither of us fared very well with the "medium" speed on the batting cages (and we were both college athletes, God that's sad) hitting the crap out of the ball on the slow speed was extremely satisfying. And there's just something about doing things that I associate with being a kid that I really love to do on my birthday. 26? Bah! I'm playing some skee ball. Grown up? Who cares, bring on the mini-golf! Slower metabolism now that I'm older? Yeah whatever, hand me that corndog!

    It was a freaking blast people. An absolute freaking blast.

    edit: damn, I knew I forgot something ... photo credit goes to The Twin. At one point in the night I handed him my camera and told him to take a picture. "Of what?" "The pretty!" I'm such an ass. That's on par with someone handing me a piece of paper and telling me to write something nice :)

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    posted by FINY @ Friday, July 28, 2006   13 comments
    Thursday, July 27, 2006
    My name is Zoom and I live on the moon, and I came downt to earth just to sing you this tune. Hey Finy, it's your birthday, TODAY!

    Every year for as long as I can remember, those lyrics have woken me up on the morning of my birthday, and this morning was no different. At 7:30 this morning the voice of a small martian sung to me via my mother's cell phone.

    That's right everyone, it's Finy's birthday. Between the birthday party last weekend, MM buying me a birthday lunch this afternoon, The Twin planning some sort of surprise for the evening (I was only give clothing tips: comfortable. And I know it's outside.), and DTR taking me out to lunch next week, this is turning into a seriously drawn out birthday - but I'm not complaining!

    But I would just like to take a second to thank my Mom today. It's been ridiculously hot the last couple days and I can't imagine that being 9-months pregnant in July of 1980 was all that comfortable. I LOVE YOU MOM.

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    posted by FINY @ Thursday, July 27, 2006   13 comments
    Tuesday, July 25, 2006
    I know it's tough to tell from what I write in this space, but I care a ridiculous amount about grammar. The written word is precious to me. Sure when I blog I throw all grammar, punctuation, and spelling rules out the window, but it's mainly because I spend all day getting paid to agonize over whether our organization should hyphenate the word email or not (my feeling is not. When the internet and email were first emerging the word was hyphenated as an abbreviated way of indicating that it was "electronic mail". At this point, email is so ingrained in our culture the hyphen is no longer needed. We all know it's electronic by now).

    But I do care. A lot. Especially when it comes to the publications I work on. I take pride in what I do, and how hard I work to do it. So when I received the call that one of our publications had arrived from the printer (well the overages had after being sent out to all 33,000 people on our mailing list) I was ecstatic. I couldn't wait to see it. I had poured over this thing for months. 24 pages of articles, some I'd written, all I'd edited, I couldn't wait to see the final product.

    But then I flipped through. And in just those few seconds I realized that that was a bad idea. I should have held onto that moment longer. That "Oh, Wow, look what I did" moment. Because the minute I cracked the spine with was over. Two typos immediately stuck out, and this thing, this project, that had become my baby for the last few months, was dirtied.

    And it's stupid because really? If I am honest with myself, not many people read this thing. Just thinking about how many mailers I get from various non-profit organizations, and knowing that 99.9% of them end up in the trash, is enough to make that point hit home. And one of the typos I doubt anyone will even notice. But I did. And I will every time I look at the damn thing now.

    So I ended up being blinded by a lot of things. Blinded by the sheer repetition of the proofing cycle. So blinded that I completely missed things that should have been obvious. I was blinded by my minds eye which scientifically does actually see what you want it to see at certain times. And I was blinded by my rage at myself. That I couldn't do what I get paid to do - catch the errors.

    This is what happens when all of the publications flow through one person. And Mom and DTR and a number of other people tried to tell me no one is perfect. But when it comes to the written word that is actually exactly what I am paid for. To fix mistakes. To be perfect.

    And I want to write about how great the weekend was, and how I think my favorite part was Sunday when all we did was buy the Twin some glasses, catch a movie, and hang out at some bookstores, and how that makes me feel a little old but I don't really care. But instead I'm still fuming at myself. And sitting here wondering how to snap myself out of it.

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    posted by FINY @ Tuesday, July 25, 2006   7 comments
    Saturday, July 22, 2006
    Halfway There
    Updates and pics on the party last night to come, but let me just say that I'm only halfway through the weekend, and already all I want to do is crawl into bed and sleep off the hangover. So instead ... I'm going to go to a BBQ and drink some more. Yeah, that's smart ...


    posted by FINY @ Saturday, July 22, 2006   1 comments
    Friday, July 21, 2006
    Let the Partying Commence!
    Drink, and dance and laugh and lie,
    Love the reeling midnight through,
    For tomorrow we shall die!
    (But, alas, we never do.)

    ~Dorothy Parker

    No, but we usually feel like we'd like to, and I am certain that come Sunday, I'll wish nothing less than death to cure the hangover I'll be feeling. Because starting this evening, the drinks will be flowing, and it's not going to stop until the wee hours of Sunday morning.

    I don't know what it was about this year's birthday that I wasn't really getting excited about. As a matter of fact, I kept flat out forgetting it was approaching. I had decided early on that I'd just get a few friends together the night of, have a few drinks, and have that be that.

    The Welshman convinced me otherwise. Our birthdays being only ten days apart, we decided to hold a joint party at our favorite bar, Professor Thom's, and suddenly what started as a small gathering of friends has ballooned into a guest list that is pushing 90. And just as suddenly, I find myself ridiculously excited about it. Not so much for the birthday celebration aspect of it, but the idea that all of my friends, everyone I care about in NYC, are going to be in one place at one time. That's just fun! I am a little worried about how my liver is going to hold up, considering the bartenders/owners of Prof. T's already have a penchant for plying The Welshman and I with beers and shots on normal nights ... God only knows what tonight is going to be like, but I am sure it won't disappoint.

    And then, before the hangover can really set in on Saturday, the party continues at DTR's on Saturday with a birthday BBQ for her roommate. There are going to be friends from college there that I haven't seen in four plus years. Drinks will be had. Reminiscing will be done.

    Why do I have the feeling that come my ACTUAL birthday on Thursday, I am still going to be feeling the after-effects of this weekend?

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    posted by FINY @ Friday, July 21, 2006   5 comments
    Wednesday, July 19, 2006
    I've Hit A New Low
    I feel like my life of late has been a little chaotic. Monday night was spent in tears, yesterday was spent getting an airconditioner, sleeping off the no-sleep Monday night, and getting the kind women at the hair salon to fix the zebra striping I had inflicted on my hair, and tonight was spent having coffee and catching up with Esther.

    Want to know the one thing I really should have been doing each of those three days? Laundry.

    But when depending on a laundromat to clean your clothes, certain time frames must be abided by. Time frames that do not seem to fit my schedule of late. So what did I do tonight after coffee? I went out and bought a couple pairs of underwear, a new pair of capri pants, and a t-shirt. Luckily there's an H&M near my office, so all told I spent only $20 on all of those things, but still. I just bought clothing because I haven't done laundry in so long. That's just sad.


    posted by FINY @ Wednesday, July 19, 2006   7 comments
    Tuesday, July 18, 2006
    Albert Einstein's definition of insanity went something like this:

    Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

    Well, it's official people, I am insane.

    See, for the last three years I have lived in the exact same room. 12' x8'. Window that looks out onto nothing but the interior air shaft of our building (that's right, interior - aka, it is approx 3'x3' and leads nowhere. The top is closed off by a skylight). Basically - an oven. And yet, every summer. EVERY SINGLE SUMMER. I think "Huh, this summer will be fine, I don't need an air conditioner!"

    Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

    I am sitting here now, at 3am, wondering why, just like last year, I'm awake all night. Crying. Wondering if it is possible to die of heat stroke in your sleep. I doubt it. Because if you're THAT hot - no way in hell are you sleeping.

    Add on to all of this that I am PMSing like there's no tomorrow, that I chose tonight to streak my hair blonde with an at-home kit, and you've got a zebra-headed-hormonal-sleep-deprived Finy, and let me tell you, it isn't pretty.

    At least the Sox won tonight. If we'd lost to the Royals ... I REALLY would have lost it.


    posted by FINY @ Tuesday, July 18, 2006   8 comments
    Sunday, July 16, 2006
    Pooping Problems
    Ok ladies, it's time I speak up, I can't be the only one who has this problem. Show some solidarity, and let me know I'm not alone. Or, make fun of me mercilessly. Whichever.

    See, I have a pooping problem. No, it's not medical. It's completely psycholigical. Some women can't poop in public restrooms. Some can't unless they know no one else is around. Still others can ONLY poop in their own bathrooms. I've never had a problem with this. No, my issue? I can't poop at my boyfriend's apartment.

    No joke, The Twin and I have been dating for somewhere around a year (if you count our "previous relationship" as he refered to it this weekend) and I still can not bring myself to poop at his place. This poses quite a problem when I stay at his place for say, the entire weekend, as I did the last two days. I mean, two days without pooping?! That's just downright unhealthy!!

    And it makes absolutely no sense. Everyone Poops! It's not like it would come as a big shock to him that I have certain biological needs! and hell, when MM lived with me half our conversations revolved around poops. We were poop freaks! I even TRIED to poop this weekend, while The Twin was outside, not even IN the apartment. Nope, still couldn't do it.

    And it's not like I haven't been completely gross in front of him. I'll burb, get food all over my face while scarfing down some delicuosly bad for me food, hell we spent all weekend doing yard work that left me sweaty, covered in dirt, and smelling completely foul. And yet, still no poop for Finy.

    Seriously, ladies, help me out here, what the HELL is my problem?!


    posted by FINY @ Sunday, July 16, 2006   26 comments
    Friday, July 14, 2006
    Thoughts and Prayers
    I'm not a very religious person. Never really have been. I believe in God and Jesus and would best describe myself as a Christian, but I have too many fundamental disagreements with the Catholic Church to remain a church-goer.

    I found out today that my friend Judd Hardy has been diagnosed with Leukemia (ALL). At the risk of pissing off a potentially vengeful God by praying for the first time in years, I am simply sending every positive thought I can out to Salt Lake, in the hopes that Judd knows how much we love him, how many lives he's touched, and how we're all here now to support him through what is most likely going to be a tough battle. But if any of you out there ARE on God's good side, please say a prayer for Judd. Oh, and if anyone knows Bono, ask him too (see the last comment on this post).

    Edit: If you'd like to know more about Leukemia, I've added The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society to my "Organizations I Care About" list at left. I've also made a donation Dave Copeland, who is running the Dublin Marathon in October as a member of the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society's Team In Training. If you'd like to support Dave, his donation page is here.


    posted by FINY @ Friday, July 14, 2006   2 comments
    Friday Fun
    As I sat on the subway this morning, wondering why I stayed out until 2am last night, sipping my iced coffee as if it was actually going to wake me up, and idly thumbing through this weeks Sports Illustrated I ran across Steve Rushin's article "Popping the Lid on Our Id".

    In said article, Rushin describes a new Google tool, called Trends. From the Google Trends About page:
    With Google Trends, you can compare the world's interest in your favorite topics. Enter up to five topics and see how often they've been searched for on Google over time. Google Trends also displays how frequently your topics have appeared in Google News stories, and which geographic regions have searched for them most often.
    Oh man, this could be fun! Of course, I need to start searching.

    Limiting my searches to the United States, it appears that, while Littleton, CO, is the city in which the most people search for the word "drunk", San Diego, CA is where the most people are looking for hangover cures. I'd like to know what those Mormons out in Salt Lake City are up to since they are the city most likely to search for "guns", and with Compton so close to Los Angeles it's surprising that those LA folks are at the top of the "anti-gun" search list. Apparently Chicago really is the liberal island in a sea of red states because they google "George Bush Sucks more than anyone (though NYC is a close second).

    Seriously people, this is a fun way to kill some time on a Friday.


    posted by FINY @ Friday, July 14, 2006   0 comments
    Wednesday, July 12, 2006
    Disproving Stereotypes
    One of the stereotypes of New Yorkers that has always bugged me is that we're all cold, unfriendly people. Yes, the "hurry up" culture is very prevalent here, but we're all just like any other group of people. There are good and bad.

    For example, I work in a 13-story building in NoHo. 12 of those floors are occupied by the offices of various non-profit organizations. The top floor is actually a penthouse apartment, occupied by a woman I've never met. All I know about this woman is that she owns a dog and that her dog-walker is not what you would call the friendliest of women. Here she is with these adorable dogs all around her and she scowls at everyone. God forbid you try to pet one of the dogs. She's the kind of New Yorker that gives the rest of us a bad name. The kind who's constantly brushing past you, power walking to some unknown destination, and probably swearing under her breath when, God-forbid, a tourist asks her for directions.

    But then there are women like Joanne, who a coworker and I met this morning. As we are standing outside our building, we see these two HUGE St. Bernard looking dogs walking down the street. We immediately started cooing, which was caught by their dog-walker. Joanne asked if we'd like to pet them, which of course we did. For five minutes or so we pet these super friendly dogs and talked with Joanne, who, after finding out we worked for the non-profit that employs us both, offered us her card and asked us to contact her so she could make a donation to us.

    See, not all New Yorkers are insensitive pricks!


    posted by FINY @ Wednesday, July 12, 2006   5 comments
    Tuesday, July 11, 2006
    One Sweet Show, Pt. II
    After leaving the Pour House, The Welshman and I headed over to Boston Billiards to meet my high school friends before going into the show. THIS is where the wheels fell off. A very quick beer and two shots later, we were headed into Fenway. I am still convinced that it was those two shots, which were my second and third within an hour and a half, were my downfall. And I think the picture of the Welshman speaks for itself:

    But once inside Fenway, I was absolutely giddy. Though many of the male members of our group were not exactly excited to see Sheryl Crow perform, I really enjoy her music and she played a solid set (though I think we missed a few songs waiting in line to get onto Yawkey Way).

    The break between Crow and DMB gave me a chance to look around the park, kind of take it all in. One of my favorite parts of the entire day was the Green Monster, which spelled out Dave Matthews Band (you can click on these pictures to make them bigger by the way):

    The break also gave the Welshman enough time to start planning to jump over the barrier onto the infield just so he could roll around on it. The idea being that the one scrawny security guy on our side of the field probably wouldn't do much damage to him.

    And then, it was time, Dave came out, and I lost all track of well, everything. They played a great set list, most notably, a fantastic cover of Sweet Caroline, which was just so venue appropriate I couldn't stand it. During that song, as I am prone to do, I called The Twin, said absolutely nothing, but held the phone up for him to listen to the song. After about 30 seconds he hung up. Which made total sense as I had called him before we got to Boston Billiards, warning of how that would most likely happen, and telling him to feel free to just hang up.

    But I told him that when I was relatively sober. I have now been drinking for somewhere around 5 hours. So all throughout the show I am texting him. Telling him I'm so sorry I was calling and texting too much and that I promised I'd stop. But of course I didn't. Instead I KEPT texting about how sorry I was. And in my totally wasted state, I was upset. No good reason, just upset. Hell he even texted me back and told me it was fine. At the time, I totally didn't believe it.

    That small issue aside, the show really was amazing. They opened with One Sweet World, one of my favorites, and closed with Two Step as an encore. And in all honesty, they could have played all their hits, and only their hits, and even though I HATE it when they do that, I still would have been happy as a pig in shit. I was at Dave Matthews at Fenway Park, it just doesn't get much better than that.

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    posted by FINY @ Tuesday, July 11, 2006   8 comments
    One Sweet Show
    Well, I survived ... barely. It was quite the weekend in Boston, here's the illustrated story:

    The Welshman and I arrived in Boston around noon, dropped our stuff off with a friend of his we were staying with, and headed out on the town. Our first stop? 21st Amendment on Beacon Hill.

    And it was there that our first two beers were had while watching the beginning of the Sox game in Chicago. Perhaps it was a bad idea for me to start drinking at 1:30, knowing that I was going to continue on through the night. But at the time, that didn't really occur to me.

    Soon after the bar we headed to Boston's famous North End. While I was in college I was OBSESSED with Bovas Bakery, which, no matter how hard you argue, I will always think makes better pastry than Mike's.

    And let's just say I was really effing excited to be at my old college haunt:

    So after that brief respite from the alcohol consumption, clearly we needed to get back to the bar.

    So off we went to The Pour House, another college tradition of mine, where shots of SoCo and Lime and a few rather large beers were had. At this point, it's around 4:30, there's still a lot of night ahead of us ...

    More to come later since Blogger is having a problem with photos at the moment ...

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    posted by FINY @ Tuesday, July 11, 2006   4 comments
    Friday, July 07, 2006
    Just for Jason*

    Well, in a few hours I will be heading, once again, to a destination weekend. This week's stop? Boston, MA for the Saturday Sheryl Crow and Dave Matthews Band show at Fenway Park. That's right, one of my favorite bands (DMB) is playing at one of my favorite places on the planet. It's possible that my head is going to explode from being so freaking happy.

    Seeing the DMB concert in Boston, whether it be at Great Woods (I refuse to call it the Tweeter Center), Foxboro, or now Fenway Park, is a bit of a tradition with my set of RI friends. We haven't missed a summer tour up there since somewhere in the mid-nineties. It's become more about getting everyone together than it has about the show itself, though in all those years we've seen some amazing ones. And inevitably, stories abound, so be on the look out for wasted Finy stories come Monday. It should be a great weekend!

    *The title of this post refers to a friend of mine who recently accused me of becoming lame since getting back together with The Twin. The lack of drunken debauchery has him seriously worried. Don't worry, Jason, I'll do my best this weekend to provide you with many an embarrassing moment!

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    posted by FINY @ Friday, July 07, 2006   6 comments
    Thursday, July 06, 2006
    Alzheimer's Awareness Day at Shea
    Well, as most of you long-time readers know, one of the causes that I care very deeply about is the Alzheimer's Association. Though I took a bit of a hiatus from the group, I am once again a member of thier NYC Junior Committee, and we've got an event coming up, so I figured it's time for a little promotion.

    On Wednesday, August 9 the Alzheimer's Association is having an Awareness Day at Shea Stadium. The Junior Committee is getting a block of tickets together in the $16 section - so please come join us! It's cheap, it's fun, and it's for a really great cause. To purchase tickets, please contact Taryn Lubin at or 212-983-6906 x221. HOPE TO SEE YOU THERE!!


    Please Join Us
    Alzheimer's Awareness Day @ Shea

    Wednesday, August 9, 2006 @ 7:10 p.m

    Available Seating & Ticket Prices
    Upper Level Reserved - $16.00
    Mezzanine Reserved - $27.00
    Mezzanine Box - $41.00

    Follow these steps to order online:
    1. Click here to go to the Mets Group Ticket Window.
    2. Please use these codes to Sign-in:
    Sign-in: ID:ALZ
    Please use all CAPS

    The Alzheimer's Association, NYC Chapter will only receive a portion of each sale when using the above codes.

    Sit Together with family, friends and fellow supporters of Alzheimer's Awareness in designated Upper Level Reserved, Mezzanine Reserved or Mezzanine Box seating.

    The New York Mets will rebate a portion of each ticket sold (through the Mets Group Ticket Window) to the Alzheimer's Association, NYC.

    All persons ordering through the Mets Group Ticket Window will receive a flashing Mets Logo Pin.

    Your group will be welcomed on the Shea Stadium scoreboard (groups of 25 or more).

    A pre-game ceremony with special recognition for Alzheimer's will begin after 6:30 p.m. on the field.

    If you are unable to attend the game, but would like to support Alzheimer's Awareness Day and the Alzheimer's Association, we would be pleased to donate any tickets purchased to caregivers for a day of respite, nursing home residents, adult day care center participants, or any group of your preference. Please indicate to us your wishes. Thank you!

    For additional information, please call Taryn Lubin, Events Manager, 212-983-6906 ext. 221.


    posted by FINY @ Thursday, July 06, 2006   3 comments
    There's No Crying at the Movies!
    Last night, The Twin and I decided to go see the new Adam Sandler movie, Click. I was in the mood for something light and brainless, and really, isn't that why Adam Sandler exists? There's nothing like Happy Gilmore or Mr. Deeds to zone out to and have a good laugh. And the previews for Click looked absolutely hilarious.

    What I wasn't expecting was to be sitting in the packed theater crying towards the end of the movie. Seriously, I mean come on. As I was sitting there, tears running down my face, head planted firmly on The Twin's shoulder so he couldn't see what a freaking sap I am (like he doesn't know that already but whatever) thinking "Pull it together woman, you're crying at a fucking ADAM SANDLER movie." It was just not right!

    I mean, luckily there were others in the theater who were crying as well, and admitedly the movie does take a decidedly heavy turn, but holy false advertising Batman! Completely not what I expected.


    posted by FINY @ Thursday, July 06, 2006   4 comments
    Monday, July 03, 2006
    Ok, I Officially Need Help
    See, I really wanted to redesign again. I didn't like the functionality of the last template and it was driving me up a wall. So I spent a LOT of time getting this one together, and when I preview my changes it looks great. But as soon as I republish, BAM, I get all these crazy symbols instead of punctuation.

    Anyone know what the HELL I am doing wrong here?

    Ok, I figured it out. For some reason, the posts that I originally wrote in word and then cut and paste into Blogger, ended up turning all the apostrophes and quotation marks into odd symbols. It just meant I had to go back into those posts and do some tweaking. I've only gone back a couple months, and am going to have to slowly go through the rest, so if you're looking at the old stuff, be patient.

    But in general, what do you guys think of the new template? My mom isn't a big fan, she liked the colors of the last one, but with this template the comments are working better and I just think it's more functional. But that's just me, do you guys like it?


    posted by FINY @ Monday, July 03, 2006   12 comments
    Sunday, July 02, 2006
    4 Weddings and a Funeral
    My father looked up at me the other night and asked, "How many weddings have you been to?"


    "And now you're going to a funeral"

    "Yeah ... ooooooh"

    So it's official, after years of friends telling me my life is like a bad sitcom, it turns out it's just a bad chick flick.

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    posted by FINY @ Sunday, July 02, 2006   4 comments
    Getting to Know Uncle Arthur
    The last time my mother saw Uncle Arthur, he was on the local news. There, standing behind an on-the-scene reporter, was my great uncle, holding a picket sign, protesting the release of The DaVinci Code. Mom called me, laughing. Sure, we didn't agree with his politics, but you had to respect a man who was still fighting for what he believed in, when most men his age we sitting at home wasting away in their recliners.

    And then, last Tuesday, my grandfather was at his apartment, about to take him to the doctor. Arthur hadn't been feeling well, and had called his older brother to drive him to his appointment. As he went to lock the back door he said three words; "Joe, catch me". And that’s exactly what my grandfather did. And just like that, his brother, my Uncle Arthur, was gone.

    It's amazing how much you learn about a person after they've died. Arthur never married, never had children. What little is left of his family could be counted on my fingers. Before arriving at the wake, I was afraid. Afraid that no one would be there. That it would be even MORE depressing than a wake always is.

    But instead what I found were dozens of mourners. Mainly people from his church group. It was astounding how many lives he had touched. And then, well, a little creepy.

    Throughout the course of the evening, I learned just how religious my uncle was. As head of a group called the Legions of Mary, Arthur was more than devout. The man had nothing in his bedroom but a small twin bed that he slept only on top of, not in, and a prayer bench. At the end of the wake, approximately 15 members of the Legion knelt before his body and recited the rosary. The entire thing. All 50 Hail Marys. In a weird monotone not-quite-unison kind of chant.

    The next day, at the funeral, it got even weirder. The two priests that eulogized Arthur, spoke of his willingness to stand in front of the "abortion mills" with his pro-life group. The term was used multiple times throughout the day. And then I looked around, and realized that there were people in the crowd, quite a few of them actually, that were wearing these large pins with pictures of fetuses on them that read; "I once looked like this too". It got to the point that when my little brother and I took up the gifts, I had to wonder if Uncle Arthur was looking down at me from wherever he was, and asking why in the hell these two heathen children were participating in his mass!

    In the end, what turned out to be the hardest part of the day came after the mass. The cemetery in which Arthur was being buried happens to hold too many of my family members. Before going over to the lunch which followed the mass (which, just for you RIers, contained every bad stereotype from Federal Hill. Remember, this is the side of the family that has more than a passing connection to the mafia), my mother, father, brother, and grandfather, drove to the plot which contains my grandmother and my sister. It was the first time I had visited since my grandmother had been buried there. And as I looked at the headstone, and saw their names, I felt the tears starting. Tried to hide them behind the sunglasses. It only got worse when my aunt and uncle arrived, and my uncle walked off at a swift pace in search of his son's grave, which was right nearby.

    I felt guilty for crying only after Uncle Arthur's funeral was over. I had cried for him when I heard the news, but as the days passed, and I learned more and more about him, I realized that I barely even knew this man. And I still feel the same way I did when I heard about him protesting the movie; I may not agree with his politics, or have his level of faith, but you have to respect a guy who lived his life exactly the way he felt he should, right to the very end.

    RIP Uncle Arthur. Put in a good word for me whenever I meet you there. Lord knows, you've probably got the most pull of anyone in the family.

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    posted by FINY @ Sunday, July 02, 2006   1 comments
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    About Me: Just a New England girl trying to make it in NYC. Email me at: soxfaninnyc [at] gmail [dot] com
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