Actually, not to burst your bubble, but that's actually not a gender-specific problem. Trust me...

And I also have a tough time peeing in public restrooms. I hate to do this, but I blame Fenway park. Back in the day, they actually had troughs in Fenway, and the troughs were in the center of the room, not pushed up against the wall. So you actually stood across from someone peeing as you tried to pee. (The troughs were, thankfully, removed a long time ago).

I was young and I'm pretty sure it scarred me for life. So now I'm the guy who tries to time my restroom entry so I can pee in the stall and not in the urinal. But when you think about it, urinals are a fairly gross invention...

And that's all I have to say on THAT issue.

 

Its so funny....I totally understand. My boyfriend had to do a "intervention" to get me to poop at his place. I wasn't feeling very well (because I was staying at his place on vacation for almost a week and HADN'T POOPED) and he said.."maybe you just need to poop" and I said..I can't. And he said..."WHAT?" and I explained how I couldn't poop at his place (and haven't been able to poop at other boyfriend's houses in the past either) and he told me how absolutely unhealthy and ridiculous that was and how EVERYONE poops. It took me over 6 months.....but now I do it fine :) there is hope!! :) (god, I c an't believe I just wrote that)

 

Hey I am going to agree with COPE on this one, definatly not gender specific. I can tell you a trick that worked for me with work a place I couldn't poop. Lots of water, lots of vitamin C and something that gives you the runs. It will force you to poop. Sorry you are having such problems but once you get it going the floogates will open.

 

I can totally relate. Had the same problem with all the guys I've dated - except for 'The One Who Got Away' and even that took awhile.

Although, once you're living with someone, if you still have trouble pooping, that is not good.

I have troubles at work, too - used to use the farthest bathroom away at my old job, praying nobody could hear me. And at my part-time job now, I use the less frequented one, hoping for more of the same.

But sometimes, if you gotta go, you gotta go. The only time I could care less is when I have my period - that's when I seem to have more frequent issues.

(Lord, I can't believe I wrote that!)

 

I agree with Ari - if you eat something that you know will make you go, maybe that will break the trend. Lots of fruit can do it - and blueberries work really well.

 

OK, you're about to become another year older, don't you think it's time you stopped using the word 'poop'?

 

Maybe it'd help if he played loud music while you're in the bathroom? And, maybe, bring a can of air freshener. Seriously. It might help you get over your phobia if you're sure you can't be heard or smelled.

Don't laugh; why else do you think that a lot of people run water when they're in the bathroom doing their business?

 

My ex had the same thing except with going to the bathroom in general. She even would go downstairs to her old place to use the bathroom when she was over to my apartment.

Really bizarre. She couldn't even urinate if she thought I could hear it. She eventually got to the point where she could urinate, but even then I had to go to the other side of the apartment and turn up the TV.

She also has the problem in general though with restrooms. She has an amazing ability to hold it forever it seemed. In the year we were dating, I could count on one hand of a high school shop teacher the number of times she used the bathroom while we were out.

 

I sometimes can't poo in my own house if we have guests! Like if my in-laws are around, that whole process shuts down until they leave!

 

What about running the water while you try to go? Or definitely try when there's a radio or TV on, that might help.

 

I agree with the other guys who said it's definitely not gender specific. Even my slackerly self deals with that same issue. My suggestion is a combination of ones above, but you need one more thing: something like home. Run some water or play some music to distract yourself, but you need something that lets you think it's home. Myabe see if he'll get the same shower curtain, or maybe use the same air freshener you use so mentally it feels like you're home at your place. That coule probably help!

 

Wow, I talk about poops and you guys come out in FORCE. I love it! Thanks for all the suggestions, I'll definitely be trying a few of them. I guess I find it more funny than anything - there's absolutely no way I shouldn't be able to poop there. And of course now that The Twin has read this when I DO eventually drop a deuce I'm going to end up coming out of the bathroom like a proud kid who just got potty trained.

 

I'm totally cracking up reading this post and the comments.

I, unfortunately, didn't get the luxury of this dilemma...

Troy and I had gone out to eat on our 2nd ro third date, and I ate beef.. which was a no-no for my HIGHLY sensitive and overactive digestive system. we had to cut out of dessert early, and I put a hurting on... nay I say VIOLATED his bathroom.


getting really drunk gives me the craps, and removes the in-the-moment shame... maybe try that?

good luck.. I hope everythign comes out alright! HAH!

 

Lots of carrots babe. Lots and lots of carrots. That'll do the trick.

 

I have the saaaameee problem. In college I used to wait till 4am to take a poop just because I knew all the drunkards would be passed out, and it was too early for the athletes to get up. So I had 20 mins of poop peace. Then when I moved into my my first place.. my ex would visit. I would make him drive around till I was done pooping. Now I live with my fiance... I try and purposely forget Grocery items so he has to leave... if that does not work.. I make him turn up the tv and hold his wallet as collateral while im on the can... if he walks in the bathroom or anywhere near it I get to take his credit card for the day. I know I know I have problems... just thought to share so you wouldnt feel as awful.

 

Ok, so there’s posts ranging from 2006 into 2007…but has anybody found complete relief from this problem? I noted all of the “home remedies”, but for those of us that truly suffer (like Anna) then you know that this is a real mental, psyche problem that running water and a turned-up episode of Seinfeld isn’t going to help. No, for those of us that truly suffer ABSOLUTELY NOBODY can be in the same house at the time we need to poop (or pee – or both). Sad but true.

So back to my original question – has anybody found a doctor or physiologist that made this all ‘go away’?

 

I've had this problem my entire life!

I just moved into a new place as well where I have a few new roommates, and they're all males. I'm a female.

This makes it utterly impossible for me to poop. The bathroom is right beside one of the guy's bedrooms, and I can hear everything he does in his room from the bathroom, so I assume he can hear everything I do from my side of the wall.

I haven't pooped in two days and it's really starting to get quite uncomfortable! I'm also super stressed about school, so that has contributed to constipation as well I think.

So all in all, I want to poop, but I can't.

Been eating bananas like crazy and drinking lots of water, taking metamucil.

Come on poop...

 

I hope someone finds a way to fix this problem with us ladies. I dont even have the urge to poop at my boyfriends house. Over Turkey Day vacation I was there from Wednesday to Monday morning and I cant rember when the last time I went was. I been with my boyfriend a year and a half and stay with him Friday to Monday morning and went I get back to my appartment on Monday, soon as I walk in the door, it hits me. Its Monday at 5pm and I already pooped 3 times today. We should not have to live like this. My boyfriend says I'm not comfortable with him because I dont fart or poop when hes around.

 

i am a dude. I actually regard myself as being very masculine. And yet I suffer severely from this problem, so clearly it is not gender-specific. I didn't have a "safe place" to go growing up, having been raised in a small house with several siblings. Reading these blogs has given me confidence that I can improve. That's a happy thought!
Keep bloggin

 

I laughin HARD

This is too funny....and yet so true.

 

I'm glad I found this. I was feeling like I was all alone in this psychosomatic pooping problem. I can't go at my boyfriend's house either,don't even get the urge, which results in bloating and constipation, and I have a very difficult time going around people in genernal. I like to get up early so I can be alone, drink coffee and play on my computer; that relaxes me enough to go. I even have a hard time going around my family. I just don't get the urge, even though I want it to happen. My suggestion is behaviorial therapy. There has to be help for this kind of problem, because I want to be able to go on vacations and spend days at my friend's homes and not have a problem.

 

Reading this has made me feel so much better, I thought I was the only one who couldn't poop at my boyfriends house. My problem even goes as far as not being able to pee in girls bathrooms if there is even one person in the room. It is TOTALLY psychological but I just don't know what to do. I was an only child who never had to share a bathroom and in college I was always smoking weed/drinking so sharing a bathroom didn't really bother me. I'm sober now and this problem seemed to get exponentially worse as I have gotten older. I don't know what to do. I am super embarrassed. My boyfriend and I live 90 miles away from one another so we always spend weekends together so that means 3 days and no pooping for me. I feel like doing this every week is messing up my digestive track or somehting. I used to be SO regular, now I'm lucky if I go 3-4X/week. HELP PLEASE!!!!!!

 

I also suffered from this for the longest time. Even as a young child I couldn't poop in anyone's bathroom or public restroom. Even when I lived at home w my mom and her boyfriend I couldn't go unless they were gone. One thing that helped was turning the shower on...it was loud enough no one could hear. Once I moved in w my husband I felt so embarrassed to go..until finally I realized this was my home so after awhile I had to go and now I'm fine. Just can't go in public unless my Stomache has a flare up.

 

My boyfriend and I have been dating for one year. I've been living with him for months and have not been able to go to the bathroom! I know it's psychological and that everyone does it, I just get so embarrassed. I used to be pee shy as well but got over that from relationships and drinking lol. My boyfriend has watched me pee, put in tampons and throw up. I have IBS (irritable bowel syndrome). It takes me a long time to go sometimes or it's diaherria(so gross i know) either way I put on the faucet, shut the door, I have air freshener and bowl cleaner. Still no luck! Please help! I get horrible stomach cramps, abdominal pain an sometimes nausea. Please help me! But it's nice to know I'm not alone.

 

Reading all those comments made me laugh so hard and I can relate to all the things you guys say here. I never go to public bathrooms, only when I really can't hold my pee anymore and I know there's no one around. I try to tell myself it's normal and that everyone doesn't and that I shouldn't give a shit (haha^^) but I just can't do it.
I'm so worried because I'm going to my boyfriend who lives far away for a month in October and going to the bathroom is one of my biggest concerns. I don't want his family to smell or hear anything even though it's completely normal. I'm trying to drink a lot of water and eat healthier and it does help. Poop will smell worse if you eat a lot of crap and I hope it will be easier for me and for you guys to poop if you know it doesn't smell a lot. So drink A LOT of water and try to avoid fat, meat and eggs.
I really hope I can grow over this, holding my poop for a month doesn't really sound like a good idea...
Should I tell my bf?

 

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